wow this actually makes me feel really happy cause that person is me…
It me
I have to tell this story.
I thought I was the first person to come out on either side of my family, but like three years after I came out, my mom was like, “By the way, my Aunt Mildred was a lesbian.”
“What? Really?”
“Yeah. My mom just told me this story the other day about her. She also had really bad depression, so bad that she was hospitalized. Her father flew out to San Diego to see her there. The nurses caught him on the way in and told him the no matter what she said, he was not allowed to get upset.” (This is the Catholic side of the family. Like, serious Irish Catholic with eleven kids and multiple priests in the family. Also super-duper Southern. And this was the 1940s and it was illegal.) “And he got real scared, but he went in. And she said, ‘Daddy, I’m a lesbian.’ He threw his hands in the air and hollered, ‘OH THANK GOD! I was worried it was gonna be something bad.’”
So. Shoutout to my Great Aunt Mildred, because she got there before I did.
Further shoutout to my second cousin Jared, who thought he was the first in even the extended family until he turned up for Granny’s 90th birthday, saw me for the first time in probably fifteen years, and heard me utter the words, “My wife…”
General shoutout to anybody who even thought they were the first in their family when they came out, even if they found out differently later on.
Y'know what, I love this story so fucking much that I’m going to schedule it to reblog when people will see it.
shoutout to those nurses who were ready to throw the fuck down for their young depressed lesbian patient like… when we talk about allies that is actually the kind of ally that has helped us to survive. in the most literal sense.
Absolutely shoutout to Aunt Mildred’s Nurses. That was some Good Allyship.
now that i think about it, jonathan harker would’ve been a great character in frankenstein. he’s so completely oblivious to dracula’s red flag parade that he’d probably completely avert the creature’s murderous rampage by accidentally befriending him after spending a page and a half writing about some weirdly tall homeless guy with daddy issues he ran into
“I’ve met the most peculiar man today. He was far taller in height than I have ever witnessed before. His face gave off a general sense of ugliness, though I cant quite place why considering he seems to be quite handsome when not in animation. A multitude of scars seemed to cover his body, perhaps from a terrible accident and the subsistent surgeries. I’ve noticed that he always looks close to crying. When i asked his name, he replied, in length, that he had none. How queer! As he seemed fairly harmless, and rather in need, I invited him to accompany me on my passage to Count Dracula. He looked bewildered, but accepted. I know not whether he shall continue to accompany me when I return to Mina, but I’m quite certain she would never reject hospitality to so miserable a man!”
Also consider:
My dearest Margaret, so odd a stranger has joined my ship! I know nothing of him other than he seems to be some sort of European, like Victor, though not the same. He introduced himself as Count Dracula, and spoke with utmost clarity and mastery of the english language. Victor looked upon him in a rather fragile state and cried out.
“Is one demon not enough for my so miserable life? Must another specter haunt my every waking hour, even now as I am so wretched? Oh, save me Walton, save me! The devil comes near, and he dost wish to smother all hope of respite and tranquility!”
Saying such, he leaped from where he was seated on the deck, and promptly fainted. I apologized for my friend’s behavior and brought Victor back to my cabin.
Sincerely, your confused brother, Robert. W
You know, considering Victor’s extensive experience with dismembering dead bodies and reanimating and the fact that his problem for his entire book was that he didn’t think anyone would believe him, I do sincerely think that Frankenstein would catch onto Dracula’s deal at once and immediately make it everyone else’s problem.
victor accidentally fucking up dracula while jonathan accidentally un-fucks up the creature? sign me the hell up!
All these posts declaring that Victor would only be able to cry and faint at Dracula seem to forget that his first meeting with his creature started with him hurling insults and trying to fistfight the 8 ft tall supernatural brick shithouse of muscle while having the constitution of a consumptive heroine so like while this absolutely wouldn’t bode well for his long term survival in Dracula’s castle you’ve gotta admit it would be way funnier.
Essentially the creature would find the one guy who’s too polite to say anything about his appearance while Dracula to his horror would have met the one man in the world who’s even more of a fucking nightmare to deal with than him.
Frankenstein, eyes bloodshot and probably on totally normal Victorian amounts of cocaine: “Hey buddy count I found all these fresh cadavers in your basement —“
Dracula: “Vait how did you find my cadavers”
Frankenstein: “Look, I need them for reasons and you just had them laying around and were obviously not using them and they’re peasants right? So —“
Dracula: “Vhat do you possibly need cadavers for?”
Frankenstein: “I already told you, REASONS! Anyway I can’t help but notice all of them are totally drained of blood and I need the blood.”
Dracula: “how are you getting them out of the ground so quickly, you’re like a hundred pounds soaking vet —“
Frankenstein: “THE BLOOD, Dracula. I need the BLOOD. WHERE THE FUCK IS THE BLOOD. TELL ME, DRAC.”
Later:
Frankenstein: *long winded flowery speech about how Count Dracula is a fiendish devil and vile abomination etc for what he’s done to the corpses*
Dracula: My brother in Christ YOU’RE the one robbing MY graveyard!!!
Frankenstein: *suckerpunches him*
you’re the only person on this post i trust. please never stop i love you
1. i can’t believe there are people in the world who haven’t heard this
2. go check out mika he’s great - important to note is that he’s mlm (he’s come out alternately as being gay, bisexual and ‘not interested in labels’ for a while) and a huge amount of his songs are about being mlm so in particular if ya need good mlm artists check him out
Seriously Mika is a gift and sunshine unto this sick sad world
mika is wildly popular in europe but his north american fanbase is like, six people and a napkin, and it’s killing me.
please listen to Mika’s entire discography because there are a LOT of classics that i’m 100% sure you’ve heard at some point in your life, all the love songs are implicitly gay, it’s great, but ESPECIALLY listen to No Place In Heaven (2015).
it always surprises me to remember that mika isn’t actually a part of the global populace’s general consciousness
because his debut album, life in cartoon motion, was such a huge part of my generation’s tween and teen years
like, i guarantee you, you can walk up to any swedish millennial, and they will still know every single line of his song lollipop
it was just a part of our upbringing;
become a crippling anxious mess
develop an attitude problem
and memorize all of mika’s lollipop
This is the song of his I remember being popular here in Ireland, Love Today!
I LOVE MIKA
Grace Kelly was such a big song for me… It’s hard for me to believe it’s considered an older song now. Bless, Mika. He’s just a wonderful person.
Ok so, here’s a funky fact: in the early evolution of fish, the claspers (reproductive organs still present in modern sharks) actually began as a genuine third pair of limbs. Sooo what if instead of becoming purely reproductive, the claspers instead developed into full on legs.
Basically what I’m saying here is six-finned fish -> hexapedal early tetrapods -> hexapedal temnospondyls -> hexapodal tiny weirdo arboreal dendrerpetids that develop membranes to glide -> amphibian dragons
they have little grabby hands and spurt venom out of their mouths and they are my precious new babies
imagine being a guy born in the Roman Republic, and you see crucifixions happen, and you know crucifixions are a real threat to you, and then someday you end up accidentally time traveling, and you end up thousands of years in the future. Not only are there crucifixes everywhere, that are too small to be used, but people literally worship them as idolatry. to the point they make the sign of a crucifix over their body to repel evil thoughts. then imagine going to the store and finding a chocolate crucifix
